Friday, November 4, 2011

Letting Go

 Autumn comes and goes each year in a whirl of activity and falling leaves. I have always enjoyed the changing of the leaves. But this year, the fall leaves have captivated me. I don't remember them ever being this vibrant. I have tried to capture it on film but, unfortunately, I'm not much of a photographer.

I am ready for this change; this new season. I need a refreshing in spirit, mind, and soul.  I have been aware of a weariness and if I'm not careful discouragement can set in. Toward the end of the year, I look back over my shoulder and see the unfulfilled hopes and dreams, and even some unanswered prayers. But fall reminds me of the harvest of God's goodness, and His provision and care for me. I have SO MUCH to be thankful for. If I were to weigh the good and bad of my life in the balances, the good would by far outweigh the bad. But we all have our weaknesses.

Yesterday I was talking to my Mom on the way home from work. It was raining hard. The water droplets running across the windshield, matched those streaming down my face as I shared my heartaches and struggles with her. The past few days, I had noticed that the leaves seemed to be fading. I wasn't ready for them to dry up and blow away just yet. The rain began to slow, and as I topped one of the foothills, I saw out across the valley and it took my breath away.

In that moment, God revealed a precious truth to me. Some things are much more beautiful when they are dying. And the rain....the rain revived the brilliancy of the leaves. I realize that I am dying! I am dying to myself and as the inner rain falls from my eyes, God is healing some deep wounds that I thought had dried up and blown away long ago. They were still clinging to me and it was time to let go. But first He wanted to color those things with the beauty of love. His love, and the love of my Mother and my husband.  I'm ready to move forward. God in His wisdom knew He had to remove the old so that He could bring in the new. Now, when my season changes again to spring, there will be room for me to blossom and bear fruit.

This morning, as I drove to work, I was praying for favor to be upon my husband in a job interview.  I kept repeating, "We are blessed and highly favored. We ARE blessed and highly favored." Then it hit me, God's favor doesn't always look like we think it should.

We pray for the house to sell--it doesn't.
We pray for the new position--we don't get it.
We pray for change--everything stays the same.
We pray to move--yet we remain.
We pray to stay--yet we are moved.

And I realize, GOD IS ALL IN IT!! His fingerprints are all over my life, my circumstances, all over ME. It IS His favor because HE orders our steps. (Proverbs 16:9, Psalm 37:23, Jer. 10:23) We can pray, and plan, and obtain good Christian council on a matter, BUT GOD directs our steps.

In my very first bible, my Mother wrote this verse: Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
I have seen that this applies to every situation in life. Trust and acknowledge God, in all things!

So what does it mean to acknowledge God? It's much more than saying, "I know You are here." Acknowledge does mean to admit or accept that He exists and that He is real and true. But it also means to respond to Him, to receive His answer, His wisdom, His timing, etc. It also means to show appreciation and to express thanksgiving. We are to give thanks in everything: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning us. (1 Thess.5:18)

God tells me in His word, "Be anxious for nothing..." He constantly reminds me no matter where I am, no matter what plans I make, no matter what road I choose it is He who orders my steps. Therefore, I can release all my hopes, all my dreams, and all my prayers to Him, even as the trees release their colorful leaves, to fall and dance and swirl at His feet.

Yes, I am letting go. But I may just grab a rake and scoop up around myself all the wonderful color of my life; all the love, and all the blessings, and all the wonders of God. Then I think I'll jump in the pile and toss handfuls into the wind, letting the Spirit spread them far and wide. And just maybe some of the love and blessings I have received will touch the life of someone else.

3 comments:

  1. Hi Peggy, Loved your message! It caused me to think of: How beautiful are the feet of those...(who follow after Christ, who are directed by the Spirit of the Almighty God, who walk upon the highest mountains, and who tread the lowest valley's, those who accept the annointing that runs down upon their feet to keep them in the Way, and who Praise God for the Joy of walking with Him and In Him even when their plans don"t come about. And who Rejoice in the fact that God" plan is for ever settled in heaven, and His plan is the best one for us. And when things appear to be dark and gloomy, to hear Him say, "Look up and see what I did, just for you." And then to realize that to love and be loved by God and those He brings into our lives is truly the greatest blessing of all. I'm encouraged to walk through this day that He has given me and Rejoice in Him and all He is. Love to you as you delight in His Way

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  2. You brought on the rain over here... [sniff, sniff]. There is such beauty in this process of dying that you just described in the words you have written here, Peggy!

    You ARE touching lives with your blessings, one of which is to write this stuff down. And you (with the Holy Spirit) are writing your raw emotions, something that can't be replicated.

    God is so omnipotent!! It really stops me in my tracks when I read what He is speaking to you...

    I was just soaking in the tub a few minutes ago before the twins woke from their nap. And as I sat there staring at the wall trying to clear my mind and make room for His voice, this verse came to me, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, but in all ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths."

    "Where did that come from?" I thought. I meditated on it... one of my favorite verses. The first I ever committed to memory (not including ones from childhood). One God brings back to me often because it means so much yet it's been a while since I've thought on it.

    As I stood in front of the mirror, I kept saying those words over and over... ALL your ways... acknowledge Him... He WILL direct my path. I asked myself, "What does it mean to acknowledge Him? Am I truly doing that in ALL my ways? ALL of them? Do I really believe He will direct my path? Even when it's a path I don't like? Or when I don't see Him in it?"

    Then I heard this verse, "Pray without ceasing." I laughed because I am constantly talking to God. Even about things that others would probably think, "That's weird. You talk to God about THAT?" I know you understand!

    I believe He is reassuring His children right now of the things you just wrote about. He IS in everything, even when it's all wrapped up and tied in a package we never pictured. But who are we to picture how it should be wrapped when He was the One who created the heavens and the earth?

    You have blessed me! Love you!

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  3. Hi Peggy, It's Ja-mamma As you spoke of tears streaming down your face like the rain drops running across the windshield of your car, I was reminded of how the rain softens the dry ground, and i thought of how your tears (our tears) soften the soil of our hearts. Psalm 126:6 cane to mind: He that goeth forth and weepeth, bearing precious SEED, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him. I can remember times when I cried on a friend's shoulder, and as I sobbed out my hurts and dissapointments, it seemed that my tears caused them to shrink in size, and the weight of them left me. When I looked at them in a different light, I realized they weren't as big and bad as I first thought them to be. This very thing will soon happen to satan. He makes himself appear frightful and strong, but that old dragon will one day be seen as the worm that he is. Isa 14:16, and those that see him will ask: Is this the man that made the earth to tremble, that did shake kingdoms? The devil is so puffed up, so full of himself, such a windbag...perhaps that's why he is called the prince of the power of the AIR. Winds change, seasons change, but God's Word never changes. That is why we can Trust Him and wait as He works all things together for our good and His Glory. This I know; You are sending out the joyful sound, a song in the night, and all who hear it will be Blessed!

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